All things Jesus – Page 3

Yesterday, I was cleaning off my dresser, and I almost threw away a piece of newspaper… I thought it was so weird that I had newspaper on my dresser, since I never, ever read the paper (it’s for food sales lol!). I glanced at the article it was folded open to, and my heart jumped in my throat. It was the article about the foster parent shortage in Idaho.

See… I’ve been trying to get back home to Arizona. I haven’t been happy here in Idaho, and I miss my family more than most people can understand (my mom was abusive, then left when I was 17, and my youngest sibling of the 5 of us was only 3 years old. We are closer than pretty much any family I’ve ever known). But the problem with my unhappiness wasn’t because I was in the wrong place. It wasn’t my husband, or my surroundings, or the lack of my family. It was because I was no longer seeking God’s will…I just wanted what I wanted.

So, a couple months ago, God told me we were supposed to stay here in Idaho, at least for a few years. I wasn’t excited about it, but at the same time, there was a peace, because I knew I was now following God’s plan, and there is so much safety in that! It doesn’t mean it will be peachy, but it is the safest place to be.

Shortly after that, a coworker who knows I have a heart for fostering and adoption asked if I’d seen the article in the paper… remember how I don’t read the paper? ?

So I went home and read it… and God deepened the desire in my heart to be a foster parent. Keep in mind, although I wanted to adopt, I used to swear I would never foster. Adoption would be heartbreak enough, I knew…the process could end up destroying me. I get way too attached, but I knew I wanted to adopt. But fostering? There’s no way I could do that. That’s WAY too much heartbreak.

Yet…God began working on my heart, and somewhere along the line, I began to have the desire to foster. Not just to adopt, but to also be a regular foster home. And God laid that desire on my husband’s heart as well.

Recently, God told me we would also have a foster ministry, helping other foster families. I have no idea of the specifics yet, but I know he will reveal them in the right time. This is both exciting and scary.? I mean, I’m not even equipped to foster kids myself, how can I minister to other families??

Well, I had been feeling discouraged, because at every turn, it seems like fostering is more distant. Everything is against us…time, finances, a house that desperately needs repairs before kids can be in it, and the list goes on… ?

But when I read that article, I knew God was reminding me of the dream he planted in my heart. His timing is perfect, I just need to trust.

So I went and laminated the article and put it on our hearts’ desires board to pray over, and stuck a copy in my planner to remind me that God is faithful.

And now I know why God had me get sidetracked with cleaning off my dresser, when my plan had been to finish cleaning the bathroom. 😉

One of the things I’m learning is that just because something is new, different, or uncomfortable, doesn’t mean it’s bad. Test all things against the Bible, and pray for the Holy Spirit’s guidance, and if you are truly open to God’s leading, you will find whether it’s of God or of the Devil. A lot of Christian circles dislike what is new or different, and then immediately twist scripture to “refute” what they don’t want to accept, only because it’s uncomfortable. Sometimes it’s a pride thing, and it would require them to acknowledge that maybe they are wrong about things they’ve thought they’ve known their whole lives. I’ve had to admit that MANY passages of the Bible I’ve accepted sermons on were actually taught incorrectly, and digging into the Hebrew and Greek reveals the true meaning. It requires me, a “seasoned” Christian to admit I am having to completely learn new things about Jesus. I feel like a baby Christian again, and it’s a humbling place to be, having to learn so much of it over again.

One of the things I’ve enjoyed is sitting under a pastor who prays after each sermon that “if there’s anything not of you God, please erase it from our minds.” That takes humility, and I’ve started praying that in my own life. Am I humble enough to accept the fact that maybe I don’t really even know God, after years in the church?? That’s a hard one, but since I’ve started praying that, I’ve learned even more about Jesus Christ, and found scripture that changes completely in the original text, showing me new things about the God I serve.

Another thing that’s been happening in my life (since you asked ??) is completely revamping my prayer life. I’m learning that prayer isn’t just for sundays and mealtimes, and once every day if you’re a “good Christian.” It’s a way of life. Pray without ceasing, it says. In the original text, it literally means “never stop.” There’s not some hidden meaning there… it really means pray ALL THE TIME. I’m learning to pray about everything! Headaches, physical afflictions, emotions, anything that comes up! The other day, my car freaked out and all the lights that were blinking when it broke and wiped out every penny we had were going off, and I thought… AGH! Not again!! We don’t have any money, Lord! Whyyyyyy??

I prayed over it that night. Heavily. Earnestly. I finally believed in what I was praying for…he would fix our car, because we couldn’t afford to get it fixed, and it’s our only vehicle that’s really operable at the moment.

The next day, I got in the car and prayed again before turning it on.

Not. One. Problem.

Thank you Jesus! These things must be so trivial to those who are already extremely familiar with the amazing miracles that come through prayer, but it’s such a wonderful thing when even a small prayer is answered for me! Jesus cares enough to fix my car. He CARES. He wants to show his power, but I’ve been putting him in a box all my life. Even when I prayed for miracles, I didn’t expect them. I didn’t want to be let down if God didn’t see fit to answer.

Something that was new(ish) to me was the spiritual realm. I have always known it existed, and I have seen and felt demon oppression and affliction. But I really tried to stuff that down, because it just wasn’t “acceptable” or “mainstream Christian” in the circles I was used to. But I have been continually shown scripture that boggles my mind in the original text. ?

Here are a few:

1 Corinthians 2 in Greek breakdown-Greek definitions/explanations are in parentheses:

Vs 13: which also we speak, not in taught of human wisdom words, but in [those] taught of [the] spirit, by spiritual [means] (the realm of the spirit) spiritual things (relating to the realm of the spirit) communicating.

Vs 14: [the] natural (physical) moreover man, not accept (warmly receive) the things of the spirit of God; foolishness (absurdity) indeed to him they are, and not he is able to understand (experience firsthand) [them], because spiritually (non physical dimension) they are discerned.

Vs 15: he who [is] moreover spiritual (spirit realm) judges all things (the parts making up the whole) he himself; however by no one is judged.

Acts 12:11 and Peter to himself having come (transitioning from one realm to another)… {wow! This was new to me! He actually left the physical realm during this miracle…he even thought he was having a vision or something}

2 Corinthians 4:18 not are looking at we the things being seen (to see something physical with spiritual results-it carries what is seen into the non-physical realm so a person can take the needed action), but the things not being seen (non physical realm); the things indeed being seen (physical realm) [are] temporary, the things however not being seen (physical realm) [are] eternal (without beginning or end). {this verse also boggles my mind…I am a spirit being with a body. But if spirits are eternal, that means I’ve always existed…I’ve only looked at it before as I will always continue to exist, but eternal means always has, always will exist. Also, think of this in the context of “time travel” within the spiritual realm…being able to see future and past wouldn’t seem so crazy in this context. lol I can’t think about it too long or my brain will explode!}

Anyway, these are just some thoughts from a girl who is re-learning the Bible, pressing into Jesus, and seeking truth. ❤

Category: All things Jesus

Thoughtful Thursday: the fostering dream from God

Brain dump! More of my daily learnings of Jesus